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6 Times You've Heard A Delhiite Roar *Tu Jaanta Nahi Mera Baap Kaun Hai?!*

mishadwivedi
Misha Dwivedi 15 June 2017

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Picture Credits: Youtube

Ah, a Delhiite's favourite war cry that rents the air like a firecracker whenever we find ourselves in a tight spot. Stereotypes exist for a reason and if you've lived here long enough, there's no use denying that baap ke naam pe chaudna = next level cheap thrills!  

Delhi is a town full of wazandar (heavyweight) surnames like Malhotras, Khannas, Khurranas and Maliks - more often than not, these are affluent families who've earned their place in the world. The family name and fortune trickles down to our generation, giving many a sense of entitlement. Now, we're not saying that's right, we're just saying it's true. If your dad's name could get things done on the double, wouldn't you use it at some point in your life? Hell, yeah!

In Delhi, "Tu jaanta nahi mera baap kaun hai" is not a question; it's a warning that shit's gonna hit the fan if you don't bow down to the Godfather in 3, 2, 1! Here's where you'll see this brahmastra in action: 

1. When A Cop Decides To Penalize You For Your Car's Tinted Windows 

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If Dilli Police had a rupee for every time someone threw this line at 'em, they'd be richer than the dude inside the car! Tinted windows are considered a style statement more than a measure for privacy (c'mon now, did you learn nothing from Snowden?) and when a puny cop tries to cramp that swag, a hardcore Dilliwallah ALWAYS whips out the magic words like a shield!   

2. When A Bouncer Stops You From Entering A Club Cuz "Stag Entry Not Allowed" 

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Picture Credits: Arkapava Ghosh

In such scenarios, an icy death stare and the introduction of the baap in question is often followed by "Main chahoon toh khade khade tera club khareed lu" to amplify the threat. No biggie, just letting 'em know who's boss for the future. The guy wielding the dialogue usually manages to establish free entry for his whole gang for life who can't stop raving about their "Bhai ka tashan". 

3. When You've Gotta Score VIP Tickets At Feroz Shah Kotla Or Get The Latest iPhone Before Anyone Else 

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Invoking the fear of the father becomes the perfect arm-twisting gimmick when you've gotta get your hands on those coveted match tickets or the latest iPhone before the rest of the world. It works wonders to clear any and every hold-up imaginable and is used with abandon and needless to say, impunity obv. The father in question may or may not even know about it!  

4. When You've Gotta Nail That Job Interview & Show Daddy You're (Finally) Independent 

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There comes a time in every entitled santaan's life when he/she has to stand on their own two feet and prove to daddy that they can survive a common man's life. At least a semblance of independence needs to be achieved jab baat ego par aajati hai. Challenge accepted! But they really didn't think this through, did they? Well, no harm in trying something which always works – "Saale, tu jaanta..." But hey, you know the rest *wink wink*! 

5. When A Parking Attendant Charges You An Extra 20 Bucks For Going 5 Mins Above 1 Hour 

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How dare he!? Besides busting his balls about how his watch is deliberately set 5 mins ahead and delivering a lecture on that's how they get you (perhaps throw in the word 'corruption' for good measure), it's irresistible not pulling the baap of all cards on them. After all, 20 rupey extra dena humari shaan ke khilaf jo hai! It’s papa’s hard-earned money, bro.

6. All Access Pass To Skip The Queue Anytime, Anywhere 

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Picture Credits: College Desk

We believe that our daddy dearest has given us a license to flout all rules in all spheres of public life. Period. Playing by the book is for losers, we live our lives with an all access pass for instant gratification. One line effectively cuts through all the lines at movie theatres or restaurants or event entries - "Tu jaanta nahi mera baap kaun hai!?" 

Got any other anecdotes when you've heard this chant ringing loud and clear? Share in the comments below! 

Disclaimer: We do not wish to paint all Delhiites with the same brush, this article is merely based on observations and is a fun take on a pet dialogue. Here's a reminder about another thing we're known for –  the ability to laugh at ourselves, cheers!

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