10 Relatives Like ‘Nagin Dance’ Uncles & Matchmaker Aunties You’ll Come Across @ Delhi Weddings

A pretty lehenga from Chandni Chowk, latest card designs from Chawri Bazaar, fresh flowers for decorations from Ghazipur Mandi, booze loaded in the trunks of cars - this is all but a trailer of the big fat Delhi weddings! And along with this helluva event, comes relatives that’ll annoy you to the core! So, if you recently had a shaadi at home or are about to attend one, then read up and let us know how many of these did you come across! 

1. The Gossip Gir... Uh, Aunties 

Picture Credits: bollywoodshaadis

No wedding and we mean no wedding in this city can ever be complete without the likes of these! ‘Did you see the saree her mummy was wearing?’ ‘Did you see the deep neck of her dress?’ ‘Did you see her jewellery set?’ ‘These guys are such show-offs’… and the list goes on. The entire wedding for this particular kind is about nothing but what others are wearing, talking about, doing and dropping their ‘expert’ comments at the drop of a hat. Our advice - auntyji, get a life! 

2. The Annoying Li’l Cousins

Picture Credits: weddingz.in/delhi/

We agree that kids are cute but they’re annoying AF! Dancing and running around the whole venue while creating a ruckus with their shrill and loud voices and breaking everything from the pretty flower decoration to the poor caterer’s crockery - they’re all over the place. But they get away with all these because ‘chota bacha hai’, huh!     

3. The Hammered Jacksons

Weddings in Delhi are incomplete without car trunks full of booze and chaknas. And these car-o-bars usually bring out the inner piyakkads of some chachas or mamas and man, it’s a sight to behold! These hammered folks won’t even be able to walk straight but they’ll dance like they have been trained by Prabhu Deva himself. Truly entertaining, this defo our favourite kind! 

4. The Foodie Brigade

These guys have their priorities set in life! Their main aim to attend any function is FOOD. Show them the food counter and they’re good for the night. They’re the encyclopedias of everything that’s on the menu, sometimes, even more well-versed in it than the host themselves. So, seek them out when you need advice on what to gorge on and what to skip! These guys are legit the coolest people at any wedding.   

5. The Matchmakers

Picture Credits: bollywoodshaadis

Matchmaking at weddings, because who cares about the bride and groom? Let’s find new people to torture! These people can be spotted easily as they’d be after the lives of all the poor souls who’re over 25 years old and have just started living their lives. They’d poke and point all the eligible ‘bakras’ according to them and embarrass them to the core in the process, that’s just how they roll!    

6. The Show Offs

Picture Credits: shadibox

‘This dress? It’s Manish Malhotra’s latest collection’ - everytime you hear a person say anything even remotely close to this at a wedding, take a shot and trust us, you’d be drunk by the time the groom makes an entry! Delhiites love to show off. Period. These species will make sure by the time the wedding comes to an end, you’d know the designer’s name of all their accessories and trousseau they have on! 

7. The ‘Nagin Dance’ Uncles

Picture Credits: indiawest.com

Dancing at a wedding is the most fun thing ever! And no wedding here is complete without an uncle being all high on the wedding madness, as he takes his handkerchief out and breaks out into an impromptu ‘nagin dance’. These guys are the reason the baaraat and the dance floor become all happening and fun!   

8. The Judgemental Panel

Picture Credits: bollywoodshaadis

If you thought that the nosy, gossip lover aunties were enough to make the weddings insufferable, then meet - the judgemental panel! These people, with their disapproving eyes and ready-to-poke-in-everyone’s-business nose, follow and scan everyone present at the functions and roll off their scathing censure like gospel truth. Ignore those intolerable hags and show off your red lipsticks, deep necklines and funky hairstyles like you do! 

9. The Live Tinder Guys

Picrure Credits: kochiservnet.com

These guys are everywhere, scanning you and mentally swiping left and right in their heads and then making a move! Live Tinder clique is basically every single guy at the wedding who’s there only because there wasn’t anything else to do at home. Checking out the parlour-perfected dolls and following them around the whole banquet hall in the hopes of some awkward chats. Oh, how creepily cute!  

10. The Modelesque Bridesmaids

Picture Credits: strandofsilk.com

Speaking of parlour-perfected dolls, meet the sisters and friends of the bride AKA the models of the weddings who consider the gala their personal runway! These guys are hard to miss (since they’re literally shining with makeup) and can be seen scattered at all the corners of the wedding venue, clicking selfies from every angle and updating their social media handles left, right and centre. 

Sounds familiar? We’re sure they all do and if, by heavens grace, you’ve missed them, then keep your eyes peeled at the next wedding!